Get the fuck out of my life.
I hate it when you’re around.
We will never be friends again.
You took my best friend from me.
You naive, naive girl.
Leave my life alone.
Bon Iver - Love More
tied to my bed
i was younger then
i had nothing to spend but time on you
3 years ago yesterday,
you were ripped from this life.
Death is the hardest thing to face alone.
Yet, we all do in the end.
The world seems unbearably unfair to me.
God, I miss you.
I wanted to not be lonely for once. But it’s all I ever am. And it is now what I am required to be because I’m too broken to be with another human. I’m told I deserve someone constantly but I never find anyone who lasts. I’m tired of being around couples all the time while feeling so lonely. That’s something I have to fix within me. Having me be enough for me. Yet I am independent. I took care of myself in another country. I love who I am. So, why have I been deprived of romantic love for so long? That’s why I’ve become the broken human I am. What I believed in most let me down and broke me this badly. Reconciling that is the most difficult thing I might ever do.
Realizing something you massively loved was a huge waste of your time is the most miserable thing you could ever encounter.
It will be my day.
After all this bullshit. It’s gonna be my fucking day.
Because it has to come one day. And I wake up and live every day in the hope that eventually, it will be that day. Where I feel better. And things finally fall into place.
Well, the build-up seemed so easy, like nothing could go wrong. Nothing in this life prepared me to watch you fighting to hang on.
And you put so much in for nothing in return.
And to see you going through this was the hardest thing i’ve done. To feel so powerless to help you, once your mind was too far gone.
And you were putting so much in for nothing in return, until they set you free.
And now that we’ve come out the other side, two strangers in a town we recognise and we’re taking our first cautious steps outside to find out why.
The ones we love the most we hurt the most and to the ones we hurt the most we give the most and the ones that take the most we need the most oh, and the ones we need the most we build our hopes upon.